Too many of us have a superb goal of things they could accomplish, but they aren?t moving toward it. If this describes you, why? Why does this glorious vision not move you, not prompt you to take action to reach it?
One possible reason is that it?s not your goal.
I knew a man who knew how to play the piano. He had practiced for twelve years and he could play any sort of music: classical, jazz, popular. He knew how to play it all.
At least that is what I was told, because I never actually heard him play. So one day I asked him why I?d never heard him play and he answered, ?When I finished my last year of piano classes, I swore I?d never touch a piano again.?
?Why?? I asked in astonishment.
?Because I never wanted to play the piano. It was my mother?s goal.?
So is your goal somebody else?s goal for you? Is it the goal of a parent? A teacher? A best friend? Society? Is it a goal that excites you or one that excites somebody else?
There?s a way to find out.
Imagine you are standing in front of all of the people who know what your goal is and you renounce it. Imagine that you say, ?I am no longer committed to this goal. It is not for me.? How would these people respond? Some will be shocked, some might be indifferent, some may even approve. But is there anyone who would be upset, or annoyed, or disappointed? If that is the case, then that?s the person whose goal it is.
So if the goal is someone else?s, do you now give it up? Is it time to grow your own goals and move on?
Maybe, but there?s a catch.
The catch is that although the goal came from somebody else, in time you might have come to take on parts of it as your own. My piano-avoiding friend may have discovered, somewhere along the way, that he had fun playing some types of music but did not wish to disclose it to his mother. If, over time , you?ve come to regard at least some part of the goal as your own, you now have to claim it as yours and not renounce it.
How could you figure out whether you have adopted it as your own?
Pretend that you?re face to face with the person whose goal it is and, even before you reject the goal, imagine that that person says to you, ?I think you should move on from that goal. It isn?t for you.?
How would you react? Maybe you would be pleased. Perhaps it wouldn?t matter to you. In these cases, the goal has not become yours and you can move on.
But if your reaction is anger or upset, or if your answer is along the lines of, ?Don?t tell me what to do with my life,? then you have come to see the goal as yours. Now is the time to welcome it, to separate from the person that gave it to you. Now is the time to declare, ?My goal is ? ?.
Jolyon Hallows is the creator of The Systematic Goal, a system for setting, planning, and achieving goals. He is a seasoned project manager, author of two books on project management, instructor in a university diploma program, and has personally trained over a thousand project managers world-wide.
Leon Edward helps people in Personal and Career Growth, leadership Development, Goal Setting, Success, Motivation, Self-Improvement, Happiness, Memory Improvement, Stress Reduction and more through his articles, blog posts and special reports . Join Leon Edwards Awesome Success Free, Get his personal success, development and growth weekly newsletter as well as success classics and tips on attracting success and wealth. Visit his Success-Leadership Library, Articles at http://www.AwesomeSuccess.org Leon Edward also helps people improve IQ, focus, memory, concentration, creativity, speed reading, public speaking , time management and reducing stress. Download his IQ Mind Brain Memory Self-Help library at his website http://www.IQMindBrainLibrary.comLeon Edward helps people improve in Leadership Development, Goal Setting, Success, Motivation, Self-Improvement, Happiness, Memory Improvement, Stress Reduction and more through his articles, blog posts and special reports . Join Leon Edwards Awesome Success Free, Get his personal development training, success and growth weekly newsletter as well as success classics and tips on attracting success and wealth. Visit his Success-Leadership Library, Articles at http://www.AwesomeSuccess.orgYou may also be interested in
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